What'd I tell ya?

OK, I admit I may have inadvertently jinxed myself in my passing comments about living to regret my trip to my mother's. I left early Thursday morning, made good time and arrived before lunch. Went to see my mom, in the hospital...she looked good. She had some swelling but she was walking with a walker and just had a single bandage strip that ran the length of her knee. She was really tired so we didn't stay long. I met my high school best friend for lunch then headed to my mom's house.

The next series of events resembled a scene out of Lemony Snickett's Series of Misfortunate Events! I won't go into great detail but upon arrival and unpacking my entire car we were forced to leave in great haste. I had to throw everything into my car including poor Faith. I finally got everything in the car and went to pull away from the house....when.....smash! I hear this awful noise and a terrible grinding. What had I done? Well, friends, I had hit an old metal rod that was driven into the ground! I hit it with the front passenger's fender and it scraped down the side until it went behind the wheelbase and under the car....where my car got hung!

Unbelievable! I almost ripped the fender off the car and made a huge gash down the side.
My mom's neighbor had to come over and jack my car up and get the post out of the bottom of my car! It was a miracle it didn't pierce the oil pan or transmission, he said!
I was a total wreck! I sat in a local gas station parking lot and cried for a good half hour! I didn't know what to do...I couldn't go back to mom's house and it was too late to try to get back to Raleigh or try to head home. So I swallowed my fear and got a hotel room. I decided that night I was going back home. I sat for what seemed like hours trying to think what to tell my mom. Finally, I just called and said "I am going home, tomorrow" and left it with no room for negotiation. She wanted me to stay. I felt like a terrible daughter. I know she will hold this over my head for....forever. But the living arrangements were unacceptable and I could not have Faith there for a week! It wasn't safe for her. I have been fighting off big time guilt and avoiding my mom's telephone calls. (I know...terrible..)
I don't talk too much about all my family here but most people on my side of the family have had trouble with boundaries. They often ask a lot of me even though they know about Faith. They don't seem to understand the limitations that are brought on by caring for her. I, in turn, have a hard time saying no when I should. I try really hard to be a responsible daughter and do the right thing, the things that children should do for their parents and family but I often end up getting my hiney handed to me. I over do it or can't live up to their expectations because I have to care for and protect Faith and my family just can't understand that.
I think I bring it on myself, sometimes, because I should just draw a line in the sand and say
"No crossing this line!" period! But I let people cross that line and it's hard to put them back.

So here I sit...not helping my mom, not being the "good daughter", not doing what I said I would do. But my responsibilities are really to my family and to my daughter, they have to come first. Even if I am torn, even if my family can't understand, right?

And just to add insult to injury...on our trip home, a trip that should have taken about 5 or 5 1/2 hrs took me almost seven! We got stuck in two serious traffic jams and I took a wrong turn off and added about 45 min. to my trip! I felt like the kid on Charlie Brown with the big cloud over his head!